Almost 3 years ago, I was teaching "self promotion for erotic entrepreneurs" at a sacred sexuality conference in Chicago. And that's where I met Reid Mihalko. During his irreverent and non tantric talk, I was impressed, not only by of his notable track record with the media but his absolutely outrageous sense of humor. Afterwards he was offering an optional Cuddle Party. My husband Michael and I secretly laughed at the idea. Michael said, "it's going to be too vanilla." But I wanted to see what this full grown man looked like in footsie pajamas, so after a hot shower we dragged our hotel pillows and blankets down to the party. We were careful to arrive on time because Reid was insistent that he would lock the doors and not let anyone in after 8pm. During the welcome circle he read from a script. The rules were simple, brilliant, and can be found on cuddleparty.com:
- Pajamas stay on the whole time.
- You don't have to cuddle anyone at a Cuddle Party, ever.
- You must ask permission and receive a verbal YES before you touch anyone. (Be as specific in your request as you can.)
- If you're a yes, say YES. If you're a no, say NO.
- If you're a maybe, say NO.
- You are encouraged to change your mind anytime you want.
- Respect your relationship agreements and communicate with your partner.
- Get your Cuddle Lifeguard On Duty or Cuddle Caddy if you have a question or concern or need assistance with anything during the Cuddle Party.
- Tears and laughter are both welcome.
- Respect people's privacy when sharing about Cuddle Parties and do not gossip.
- Arrive on time.
- Be hygienically savvy.
After the event I was in cloud 9. The simple, clean, high state was an absolute revelation! I felt that in 5 years of volunteering on the SD Tantra visioning council ...this was just the medicine that the community was missing. The following morning I cornered Reid and started to discuss some of the unique needs and desires of the San Diego tantra and spiritual community. Reid revealed that Cuddle Party TM was specifically designed to make a room full of strangers feel safe enough to cuddle, even in the most conservative towns in middle america. Which is also why it's teachings are heavily protected by trade mark law. And though the Cuddle Party facilitators course offers immense value to teachers and community leaders of all types, what I was wanting was a more advanced version of these teachings. Something that would be relevant to a room full of relationship and communication BLACKBELTS.
So with some private mentorship, Reid supported me in designing my monthly Sacred Snuggle Party. In the last three years, it has become the most popular event that I offer, and I have reid to thank for that. This event truly stands on the shoulders of Cuddle party TM. I believe that a true master will ritualistically repeat their basic training so that they don't get too far away from their foundation. Which is why I've invited Reid to bring Cuddle Party TM to San Diego on a regular basis, and it is also well attended by newbies and masters alike.
Whether or not you who attended the recent Cuddle Party with Reid Mihalko (Pictured above) I invite you to come to our Monthly Sacred Snuggle party and Performance art Potluck this Saturday in Pacific Beach (write email@example.com to reserve your space and get directions.)
During a Sacred Snuggle Party and Performance art potluck: You dress in flowey, or comfy yoga pants or goddess wear. After arivals, we initiate the evening with a non-denominational prayer before our yummy vegetarian potluck, and then after plates are washed, we sit back and enjoy a half out of performance art put on by the San Diego Tantra Theater Troupe. Afterwards we do a discussion and then start the sacred circle. The sacred circle involves a spiritual invocation, icebreakers and social agreements (AKA rules.) The rules are modified from the original Cuddle Party rules because it is not a non-sexual event. Spiritual, sensual and sexual energy is all encouraged. Amongst consensual adults, clothing does not necessarily have to stay on. Flirting, making out and running sacred sexual energy is welcome. At or around 11pm we will call a closing circle to meditate, reflect and share the highlights and lowlights of the evening. I look forward to snuggling with you soon!