Auditioning for Tantra Theater's Dick Dialogues

     Below are a few exerpts that were used for cold-readings at tonight's auditions for Tantra Theater's new show: Dick Dialogues. The instructions were to select a piece by just reading the title and do a dramatic interpretation of literature using one prop, but without reading the actual text.

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Then Man Who Lost His Penis
by Victoria Hamburger
What happened to John Wayne Bobbitt after he got sliced and diced? It's been a long road for John Wayne since 1993, when his Ecuadorian wife, Lorena, took a Ginsa knife to his manhood in the middle of the night, driving off with his severed penis and chucking it in a field. Police managed to retrieve the thing and surgeons re-attached little John to big John. And then John Wayne 'Frankenpenis' Bobbitt's story really began. This is a tale with many twists: from porn career ('Frankenpenis') to failed stand up comedian); a brief stint as a minister in a Las Vegas church; limo driver for a brothel; a prison sentence and a botched penis enlargement. Even now, as a simple furniture removal man, his life is as dramatic as ever.
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I've cum a long way
 by ric
      Like most guys, a friend introduced me to masturbation. In my case, by taking me into the woods. He found a secluded spot. I was clueless as to what he was up to, but he proceeded to pull his pants down, and suggested I do the same. I watched him slowly stroke himself and I did the same with my little hairless cock —to no avail. I obviously wasn’t “of age” to get hard--yet.
      He kept on stroking and to my innocent amazement his penis grew big and red. I didn’t know what he was doing but he was surely enjoying it by the look on his face and his grunting. All of a sudden he stopped stroking, shuddered and this white gooey stuff squirted through the air.
     A year later I was to learn why he enjoyed rubbing himself so much. I began to grow pubic hair and the wet dreams were coming often at night. I learned to arouse myself by rubbing my cock against soft things and eventually squirting small amounts of cum. My sexual awakening had it's awkward sides as my newly awake penis would sometimes get a hard-on even when I rode the bus--it must have been the vibrations. This made for some "interesting" departures from the bus!
 http://www.dodsonandross.com/

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"Penis Envy"
Source: wikipedia
     Penis Envy is a common term coined by Freud, it's a real psychological complex, where women grow up and notice that they don't have an "external appendage" like Dad or Brother.
     She desires a penis, and the power that it represents. Commonly young girls wonder when theirs will grow, and are devistated when they find out they wont get one.
She may develop a sexual desire for her father and blame her mother for her apparent castration.
Often women display signs of "penis envy" with a Garden Hose, by Spraying and Spraying, or by becoming obsessively attracted to large penises, or by feeling angry at men and in the most extreme case wanting to castrate them. Penis envy has been said to motivate women to seek men’s jobs, becoming firefighters, Marines, truck drivers, and boxers.
     Feminist psychoanalist Karen Horney decided to turn it around and develop the concept of "womb envy" to describe the condition of men who wish they could be life giving goddesses.

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The Procedure
      We are pleased to announce that we are now offering the newest procedure in cosmetic surgery for men. This is a penile shaft enhancement procedure that is simple, safe and designed to increase both the LENGTH and CIRCUMFERENCE of the penile shaft.
     In the lengthening procedure, the doctor releases the suspensory ligaments safely with a laser and results generally range from 1-1/2" to 2." There is no way to predict what that length gain will be prior to surgery. Post-operative stretching is essential to success.
      The enlargement procedure involves a simple transfer of the patient's own fat cells. Because the penile shaft is narrower than the maximum diameter of the head, the doctor usually fills out the shaft slightly beyond head's maximum diameter.
      The risks are not high, but there are instances where patients do experience bleeding and bruising as well as swelling, but these are all temporary conditions. Other times there is a keloid scar that develops at the surgical site or a decrease in the upward position during erection. And in some instances the incisions on the skin separate and an infection develops. I suppose the greatest risk is that the patient will find that their penis is lacking in sensation and they develop erectile dysfunction.
       But overall, Penis enhancement surgery is a relatively safe, simple and performed on an outpatient basis under general anesthesia.
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Afterward the playful cold readings we settled into a deeper dialogue about our relationship to the Penis, borrowed from Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross:

"How to Celebrate your cock"
    In the interest of healing men’s attitude toward the appearance and size of their genitals, we offer a view of men’s sex organs generated by men who speak in their own words about how they feel about their adorable dicks.
1.How do you feel about the general appearance of your genitals; the color, texture, size, the shape of the glans, foreskin (if any), testicles, etc?
2. Do you talk to your dick? What did you call your sex organ as a child? Have you given him a pet name? Does he have ideas of his own?
3. How does he like to be lubricated, touched, and stroked?
4. Is your pubic hair natural, trimmed, or shaved?
5. What is your favorite method of masturbation?
6. How and when did you have your first orgasm?
7. Have you ever shared masturbation with another person? Where and when?
8. What kind of fantasies do you have?
9. What do you like best about the orgasms you have with yourself?
10. What else do you want to share about your relationship to your dick?
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THE INVITATION:
If your interested in co-creating a show entitled: Dick Dialogues, come to our Free Audition on  May 20th Free Open House for Tantra Theater 90 day Journey. No experience necessary. The journey involves at least 9 weekly rehearsals and a private session that culminate in a public showcase on Aug. 21st. And a video recording of 5-10 minutes of a polished performance which you can show your friends and lovers. If you're interested we invite you to join our Free Open House. The Theme is: Dick Dialogues. Both Men and women are invited to explore the sacred relationship to the lingam, penis or dick. This first gathering is an audition where Kamala Devi will access your willingness and you can see if you resonate with Kamala's directing style. Course runs: 6:45pm on Thursdays Jan. 21st; Feb 4th,11th,18th; March 4th,11th,18th; and April 1st, 8th and 15th. Course fee of $397 includes 2 hours of private coaching, DVD of your performance, graduation party and optional attendance to an additional 6 comedy improv classes.